Would I Still Recommend Home Birth After Losing My Son? Absolutely—Here’s Why.
A deeply personal reflection on home birth, loss, and what I wish every woman knew before giving birth at home—because wisdom born from grief can still lead others safely home.
On February 23, 2025, I gave birth to my son Maverick Jeremiah. Labor began at home, and end with an emergency C section, 3 blood transfusions, a transfer to a hospital.
Just seventeen hours after giving birth, I had to say goodbye to him.
Nothing about that sentence is easy to write. And if I’m being honest, this post has been sitting on my heart for a while because it’s more than just a story—it’s a responsibility. A responsibility to honor my son, to honor my healing, and to honor every woman walking into her birthing experience hopeful, yet uncertain.
So let’s start with the question I get asked most often:
Would I still recommend home birth—even after my own wasn’t successful?
Yes. Absolutely.
But only with context and caution, at least the first time around.
Because here’s the truth: just because something didn’t work for one person doesn’t mean it won’t work for another. Birth is not one-size-fits-all. And success isn't always defined by location—but by preparation, support, and safety.
If I could go back to February 2025 and do it all again, here are three things I would do differently—three things I now believe every woman considering a home birth needs to know:
1. Get a Wellness Check—Even If You’re “Just a Few Days Late”
Yes, it's true that only 4-5% of babies are born on their due date, and many healthy pregnancies go past 40 weeks. But after going one week overdue, I wish I had requested an ultrasound—just for peace of mind.
Sometimes, intuition whispers before circumstances shout.
Whether it’s checking amniotic fluid, baby’s positioning, or placental health, these are insights you deserve to have. Home birth doesn’t mean skipping medical awareness. It means balancing trust in your body with the wisdom of monitoring.
You are not overreacting by double-checking. You are advocating.
2. Understand the Difference Between a Lay Midwife & a Certified Nurse Midwife
This might be a hot take, but it’s one I stand by with my whole heart.
There is a difference—and it matters.
Certified Nurse Midwives (CNMs) are registered nurses with advanced training and are licensed to practice in all 50 states. They can provide care in hospitals, birth centers, and homes.
Lay midwives (also called traditional midwives or direct-entry midwives) have experience, but their training varies widely.
If I knew then, what I know now, I would’ve gone the route of CNM, rather than a lay midwife. This isn’t to throw shade, I just found out the difference too late and the hard way.
3. Have a Contingency Plan—Even If You’re Confident You Won’t Need It
If you’re planning a home birth, especially in a rural area, have a Plan B. And don’t just mentally file it away—write it down, share it with your birth team, and know the steps.
I live just three blocks from the hospital. That proximity, no exaggeration, saved my life.
Even if you’re confident, make sure your plan includes:
The fastest route to the nearest hospital
A bag pre-packed in case of transfer
Phone numbers for backup support
Knowledge of which hospitals nearby are VBAC-friendly or home-birth-informed
I pray you never need it. But if you do, you’ll be so glad you had it.
In Closing: This is What It Means to Take an L and Turn It Into a Lesson
I didn’t share this to scare you out of a home birth. I shared this to support you in having an informed one.
Because birth isn’t just about intuition—it’s about integration. The merging of ancient wisdom with modern safety. The understanding that while your body was made for this, your backup plan honors the parts you can’t always predict.
I wouldn’t change that I chose a home birth. But I would change how I prepared for it.
And if this post helps even one woman give birth safely, or ask one more question before delivery, then Maverick’s story continues to have purpose.
Thank you for holding space for mine.
Love you, mean it!
Berri
Sending you so much love ❤️ Thank you for having the courage to share your story and the wisdom you learned for it. I’m so sorry, I can’t imagine what you went through.